Yes, I agree it had been a special occasion (Jon even said she never called him by his given name in the same part), but she didn’t only ignored him. She tried to make everyone treat him diferently (aka Sansa who never thinks of Jon as her brother but as ‘the bastard’, and we know Catlyn had much more saying in the way Sansa behaved than in everyone else’s), she made him feel out of place, she made him cry (again, in the same part he says that if it was a different time he’d ran away and cry after what Catlyn told him, as if it’s a normal occurency to him). You might say “she doesn’t owe him anything” because he’s not her son, which is fine, she definetly doesn’t. But, as had been very well put before, just because her actions are understandable doesn’t mean they’re justifiable. Jon Snow is a kid, that had grown up on a Castle, which is more than others bastards can say. Well, he’s called a Bastard endelessly (by our so understanding Catlyn), never feeling like he belongs there (he wants to go to the Wall at age fourteen, for God’s sakes!). Even Theon was treated more kindly by Catlyn than Jon, and Theon was a hostage. She doesn’t owe him anything, but it doesn’t mean she is on her right to hurt him with her words or, more often, her cold silence and hatred for him. To a kid, sometimes the silence can make more damage than anything.
What I’m saying is that her actions are not abusive. They were certainly not the best way for any person to act, but she is at the bedside of her favorite child, who is clinging to life. She is grieving. Sometimes we say things in grief that we wouldn’t normally say.
Sansa was an impressionable child who followed the example of her mother. There’s no evidence to indicate that Theon was treated more fairly than Jon because Catelyn makes it clear in her point of view that she doesn’t trust him at all. Furthermore, Catelyn and Jon’s relationship did not stop him from forming relationships with his other siblings, Maester Luwin, and the other servants of Winterfell. Catelyn had the ability to prevent these things, but she didn’t. Her treatment of him doesn’t scar him for life, he isn’t some wounded person who can’t love anyone because she didn’t love him. Jon was not neglected.
Catelyn is human and she makes mistakes. She’s defying the standard Mother rule and that makes her interesting.
I agree with both of these posts and I’m reblogging because I think this is necessary commentary. I’m not sure why anyone is upset with Cat, I think if there’s someone we should be upset with it’s the writers and producers. Taking away and invalidating Cat’s resentment towards Jon was a really low blow to her character. It has nothing to do with “humanizing” her. Humans are flawed. I like Cat as a character (not necessarily as a person but as a character) because she’s flawed. Now we’re making her feel guilty for her treatment of Jon? When her behavior towards him is a cornerstone of her character and his story arc? We’re making her hostile towards Talisa when she was always kind and supportive towards Jeyne (not of Robb’s decision but towards his wife)? I’m just not okay with any of this. Can we just cut Robb and Cat out of the show if they’re not going to be written as Cat and Robb?